After years of secondary infertility, a high risk pregnancy and a premature delivery, my son Toby was born, all 4lbs 8oz of him. The week he was in the NICU was the longest in my life, but I was so happy to finally bring my healthy son home. He doubled his birth weight in six weeks. He was born a fighter and that has never changed.
The first time I suspected Toby had autism is when he was 18 months old. My first son is autistic, and I recognized the signs, but expected a fight because it took so long to diagnose my first son. When Toby was 2, he couldn't point, rarely made eye contact, and he only had 5 words which he almost never used to communicate. I was surprised that when he was assessed he was enrolled into Early Intervention right away. He was officially diagnosed at 3 as being severely autistic.
Like any typical 3 year old, Toby loves dirt, play dough, trains, and being tickled--he just does these things a bit differently than the average child. Unlike typical 3 year olds, he is just learning to talk, and his life revolves around his ABA schedule. ABA therapy cannot and will not ever change who he is, but in the past year he has made so much progress and his world has opened up to us in ways we were afraid to hope for.
He is still learning to talk and has a hard time asking for simple things like a cup of juice, although he very clearly communicates by placing a cup in our hand and walking us to the fridge. He shows us who he is by cuddling with us and spontaneously telling us "I love you" and how he'll hold the hand of his sleeping baby sister and say "night night, Lily."
Toby is precious to me. Just having him in my life has made me a better person. Toby has taught me to appreciate every accomplishment, no matter how small and to find wonder in the little things in life.
Sanger, CA
