Stories of Hope

How Autism has Affected Me

When I was a toddler, my parents knew that I had some delays. I had some language developed by age 3 but it was limited. In January 1997, when I was 42 months old, I was diagnosed with PDD-NOS. Then in the summer of 1997, I had an ABA therapy program that I took for at least 3 years. And then finally, early in 2001, I was diagnosed with meeting the criteria for Asperger's instead of autism. I always had educational assistants with me in elementary as I struggled a lot academically/had a hard time paying attention to instructions and details. I also had some behavioral issues for a good part of elementary which made the majority of my peers dislike me. I struggled to use my words and stay in control at times when people were frustrating me. All of these basic social skills that were easily picked up by the other kids at an early age, I struggled with. I did have some friends in elementary but I had a hard time keeping them. Most recesses between grade 6 and 8 were spent alone as I feared rejection a lot to the point that I let people come to me instead. High school didn't improve much at all socially, despite the fact that I got better grades in high school compared to elementary. I had almost no friends, and late in grade 9 I even walked with a limp that was significant enough for people to notice (I had anxiety with walking in general as at one point I had a hard time walking with a pair of shoes I had). My college life has generally been acquaintances at best (I used to go to Sheridan in Oakville Ontario), and I still have had some social issues in my early adult years, but I try to remind myself that if people don't like me, that it is their problem. Next year, I am going to be an Environmental Technology student at Fanshawe in London Ontario, and I also have an interest in meteorology.

Cory Morrison
Oakville, Canada

Maddie "Let It Go"

My daughter Maddie was diagnosed with Asperger's at age 3 (almost 4). She was non-verbal in the sense of communicating in sentences with others. She had an extensive vocabulary. Maddie loved books and memorizing them. There was no way for me to skip any pages during nightly bedtime reading with her because she had the books memorized. She also communicated through singing. She has always had an uncanny ability to sing on pitch ever since she was age one.

Tomorrow, May 30, 2014, she will graduate from high school. She has maintained a 4.0+ grade point average throughout her high school career. She took several AP classes as well and tested out of her IEP which is a huge accomplishment.

Maddie has never been given a chance to sing in front of her peers or teachers...no one gave her a chance. Finally, a week before she graduates, one teacher believed in her enough to let her perform at her Senior Farewell Rally. Her performance was amazing. Her peers and teachers cheered for her, and she couldn't believe the applause she received.

It was a life-changing experience for her. She has had so much confidence and felt great about herself these last six days. She said she finally felt visible instead of invisible and that she actually mattered.

She will be going to college in the fall to study music.

Laura
Sacramento, CA

My Story With Asperger's

When I was little I was "different" and an introvert I would rather play with myself than other kids my age. I have always wanted to be a published author from the age of 7/8 years old. When I got to Secondary school nobody else cared for creative writing and writing stories. I would sometimes miss understand jokes and think are they being scars tic or not? I was bullied for having Asperger's and a bully myself. Eventually I was expelled for my behaviour.

I went to a new school and hated it so I ended up dropping out with no gcses. I studied in other various places but ended up dropping out.

I am now 20 and just finished doing my exams, I plan on doing a levels and going to uni in the future. I would like to be a proper published author but maybe work with Aspies as well. I even have my own website for people with ASD or on the spectrum. Its weird how a lot of people my age are having kids and then theirs me, I just want to be successful

Paige Nicks
West Midlands, United Kingdom

Life with Asperger's

Ever since I was a baby (three weeks early and 4lb 11oz), my mother knew instantly that I was different because I hardly kept eye contact with her and from what I know I did not start talking till I was two or three years old, my first word was juice. My mum told me also that as a child, I would line up colouring pencils and even toy cars in a line. I even hated transitions in my life, because when my parents split up when I was eight, I was so upset and blamed myself for it. Two years later, ten years old I was in and out of primary school, having tests and after all this, I was diagnosed with mild Asperger's Syndrome. My whole world turned upside when I found out this, because I felt strange and not myself at all.

It was something at that time, I was not proud of as I knew I would get bullied throughout my secondary school years which did happen. I hated school so much, I was in and out of that too, receiving speech and language therapy. During this, they would help me recognise facial expressions, body language, tone of voice and even emotions/feelings which I struggled to get to grips of. I was even suicidal, I did not want to live, because I felt my life would not be a normal one. I felt abnormal at times and asked why I am the one like this.

However, I can assure you, today at almost 22 years old; I am proud of the person I have become and through the battles I still overcome (I suffer from mild depression and anxiety now). I have come back fighting because I know I am my own person who hopes to inspire children with various disabilities that they can achieve their goals in life. I may not be intelligent, although I put a 110% in my College work which I aim high in through studying the Childcare and Education Level 3. I am determined to get the B overall in it!

Lauren McElhinney
London, United Kingdom

Can you please help me to decide.....

My 2 year old only child/son diagnosed possibly with autism. His doctor wasn't not 100% sure but the signs are there. I brought him to developmental pedia because my son doesn't looking back when we call him and no eye contact. He was really a TV addict since 7 month-old and he's only child to our house, he has no playmate. Maybe because of his environment and lack of socialization. He was with his nanny most of the time. And my husband and i just see him at night and during weekend because of work.

The doctor suggested OT for 2-3 times a week. My son started his OT for several weeks and he doesn't cooperate. He cried most of the time, keep running after me and we ended up paid for nothing :(

Here's my problem. My husband asked me to resign from work and be a full time mom, we still on denial that he might doesn't have ASD. He suggested to stop him from OT and i will take care of him instead. After 6 months if no changes happen we'll resume to OT. . You know its hard for me to decide, THERAPY ARE COSTLY and we couldn't afford it if i'll resign from work. Please please enlighten me :(

Anonymous
manila, Philippines

A Different Kind of Love

I first met my girlfriend when I was leaving home for the first time. I was newly 18, and ready for change. I hopped aboard a plane from the United States, and flew to Ontario, Canada. We were only friends at first, but she still knew me better than anyone else. When I had nowhere to go, she was there for me. As the days flew by, I felt myself falling more and more in love with her. I'd known from the start that she has autism, and I had had very little experience with the "disorder" until I met her and immersed myself into her world.
From a young age, society had conditioned Dawn to believe that autism meant there was something wrong with her. She apologized for her quirks, and tried to hide them. As I began reassuring her more, she stopped trying to be "normal" around me. I soon became the only person she felt truly comfortable with. She stopped hiding her stimming from me, and began asking me the questions that other people had told her were stupid. I told her that I didn't want her to hide anything from me, and she could just be herself. In doing so, she opened herself up to me as she had no one before, and I did the same.
Eventually, I got up the courage to ask her out. After a moment of consideration, she answered with a smile and a nod. Since then, we have been going strong. There have been meltdowns, arguments, misunderstandings, and problems, much like any relationship. Her brain works differently than mine, and can be hard to understand. Yet, I wouldn't change a single thing about her. I love her, not despite her autism, but for it. Autism helps make her who she is. She is logical, intelligent, honest, and passionate. She is also loving, gentle, kind, beautiful, empathetic, caring, and uniquely amazing. Everyone has a right to be who they are, the only people who should be ashamed are the ones who deny you that right.

Alyssa Ahrens
Merrillville, IN

Fan of the Fab Four

My son John was diagnosed with autism at 3. It was devastating at first, but I found out that his diagnosis didn't change the person he is. He is still my wonderfully lovable little boy. He is still non verbal at the age of 5 (almost 6) and it makes it a little hard with communication. He gets frustrated easily if you don't understand what he wants. His frustration doesn't last long though because if you put Beatle's music on, it makes everything better :) There is no bigger beatle's fan out there than my son!! He listens to The Beatle's all day long, every single day and watches the yellow submarine movie a couple times a day (yuck!). It's his way of coping with his sensory confusion. He has loved The Beatle's since he was 1. It is so wonderful to see the joy in his eyes when we take him to see American English (a beatles tribute band) and when his favorite beatle's song comes on. His favorite song has always been yellow submarine. He has learned to love all Beatle's music, but yellow submarine will forever be his favorite. For his 5th birthday, we threw him a yellow submarine birthday party. It was one of the funnest days of our lives. I hope as he gets older, he will be able to communicate better and his frustration levels go down, but I hope that he will forever love The beatle's. After all, I now know the lyrics to just about every song they ever made. I wouldn't change it for the world

Rene
Kankakee, IL

Soul-mates

My grandson was diagnosed at the age of two. Yes, I was devastated at first. Then I began to realize it was the best that could have happened. He still has the illness and sometimes struggles, but he and I are connected like no one else. I wouldn't change him for anything in the world. My daughter once asked, how do you understand him with not much talking at the time. I responded, I don't know, we are just soul mates. We don't have to talk to understand each other. I believe that when one part of the brain is not as it should be, another part is over developed. In Cole's case he has a beautiful voice and can sing any tune in perfect pitch after hearing it once. He's also way cool in other ways as well. He will always have the illness, but the illness does not have to control his hopes and dreams.

Jill davies
Redford, MI

Different, Not less

This is my beautiful daughter MaKayla but we call her Kayla. She was 6 years old in this photo but she is now 12. Kayla was diagnoses at a very late age, she was 9 almost 10. Her official diagnosis was PDD NOS because of her age but she now has an official diagnosis of Autism. I remember thinking when we got the diagnosis that she was broken and I felt like a horrible mother for feeling that way. Then God showed me that she was not broken she was just different and that he doesn't make mistakes and she was born just the way that she was always meant to be. She struggles just like lots of kids with autism but she is such an inspiration to myself, her father, our family, and everyone who has the joy of being able to know her. She is high functioning and sometimes people tell me that they had no idea that she struggled with this. One of the biggest blessings in all of this was having my daughter show me a different way to love, a more unconditional way to love. Kayla is just a loving little girl to people she knows and people she doesn't know....she is one of the most caring people I have ever known.

I look forward to continuing to watch her grown and learn how to do things on her own in her own way. She is a fighter and she doesn't let her autism keep her down. If it makes something hard for her she tries and tries again until she figures out how to do it. She doesn't even care that it may be different than the way that other people do it. She is definitely something special and anyone who has the chance to get to know her is blessed. I wouldn't change my little girl for the world and my husband and I will always be here for her to help her along the way and enjoy the ride ourselves.

Anonymous
Arunde, ME

From Zero to Hero!

I was diagnosed with high functioning autism at age 4 in December 1994. The doctors told my mother not to expect much from me at the young age I was (even told me I wouldn't develop muscle tone). With the help of Christ, as well as many other great sources of support including my father, grandmother, other close friends and loved ones, my mother went above and beyond to fit me into society (sometimes against my own wishes).

I was initially placed in Special Education under Pam Davenport in 1996, but her and my mother discovered that I was picking up on other children's behaviors and cues which led to their decision to place me in mainstream classes instead. Honestly, I believe elementary school was where I struggled the most in social aspect. No matter what happened, my mother and I fought through the difficulties associated with life. She exposed me to various types of activities which included, but not limited to Cub Scouts, Christmas Plays, Youth Group, Boy Scouts. Throughout Elementary School I was on the honor roll and even won the Spelling Bee in 3rd grade.

In High School , life got a little better for me on the social spectrum as well as learning about life itself. While students took their time to accept me for who I was, it didn't stop me from getting involved with such activities as Beta Club, Track and Field, Prom, FFA, and many other various activities. All throughout High school and Middle school, I won many honors including highest grades in such classes as English, Math, History, Spanish, etc.

I am currently 24 years of age attending graduate school at Eastern Kentucky University for a Master's degree in Network Security Management. At this point, I have a Bachelor's Degree Cum Laude in Network Security and Electronics, work 3 part time jobs as a tutor, note-taker, and computer technician, and have once interned at NASA Goddard Space Flight Center earning an ambassadorship among them. I don't let autism define me, I let who I am define my life!

Nicholas Johnson
Danville, KY